Kalimataan khafeefatan `ala al-lisaan thaqeelataan fi 'l-meezan, SubhanAllah wa bi-hamidihi SubhanAllahi 'l-`Adheem - two words which are light on the tongue, heavy in the Scales (on Judgment Day), Glory be to Allah, Glory be to Allah the Tremendous.
No one suffered what Sayyidina Muhammad (s) suffered. And he suffered from his own tribe, his own people and he suffered from the unbelievers. This is where they tortured him and abused him.On the other side, we cannot say he suffered, but we can say he is the perfect man that Allah created; the perfect human being. He also didn’t take any moment of relaxation of rest in his life without continuous worshipness day and night, where he said, "laa raahata fid-deen - There is no rest in religion." How can you rest?
If someone will tell you, "I will give you this island, a small island, as a resort, but you have to do your best for me and work for me all your life and I will give you that." So what do you do? An island and resort worth millions. So what do you do? You work for that person or not? (yes) Yes, that is correct, you work. You don’t say, "Oh I cannot! I am tired." At that time you don’t say, "I am tired." Why you said, "I am tired?" He said, "all of them are tired, hungry." How do you know? Ask them? Are you tired? No. Are you hungry? No. So you see? Why you spoke on their behalf?
So that is the problem - they don’t see themselves. People don’t look inwards, they look outwards. When you said that, it means you are the one who doesn’t want to do it so you blame it on the others. So you cannot refuse if someone comes and tells you, "I am giving you that island" or "I am giving you that new car. But you have to keep up all night, 30 days. 30 days, day and night, not sleeping." He will drink coffee and be awake. They are tired, not him. For sure there is no doubt about it.
So everyone is out for his own benefit. There is no doubt you will work hard in order to get what he likes to get. If someone offered you a high position but says, "you have to work for me, I am giving you authority to act on my behalf but you have to work for me." He is a king. So you are happy with that post. You work for it day and night.
So Sayyidina Muhammad (s), besides being tortured by unbelievers and idol-worshippers he dedicated his life to his Lord. Not sleeping. Sayyida Ayesha said that from standing day and night praying his feet were swollen - tawaramat qadamaah. And she asked him, "Ya Rasulullah! qad ghafar Allah laka ma taqadama min dhanbik wa maa ta-akhar - O Prophet of Allah, for sure Allah has forgiven whatever you have done of sins past or future." (The Prophet replied, “O Ayesha, shall I not be a thankful servant?” Inheritors of Prophet (s) their feet will get swollen. You understand? I repeat. The inheritors of the Prophet (s) their feet will get swollen in their worship day and night. That will reflect on them from the Prophet (s). That is why you see that reflected on them. Look at Mawlana Shaykh and see.
So you try your best and dedicate your life struggling for dunya and struggling for akhira. Ya Rabbee anta maqsoodee - O my Lord, you are my aim. I don’t want dunya and I don’t want akhira and You are my aim and I want You to be satisfied with me. That is what Sayyidina Prophet (s) said. So for sure those who have the blood of the Prophet (s) physically or they have that light in them spiritually so of course they face problems. Compare the problems that you face, compared to the (problems faced by the) Prophet (s) is a drop in an ocean.
Alhamdulillah, you encountered a problem that you are struggling with. At least it didn’t go further than that. It stopped at that. If you want to reconciliate your problem with the other parties you might endanger yourself in any kind of accident because of this thinking you want to overcome or this struggle. The best is what happened today - al-khayru feemaa waqi`a.
If two people are fighting a split it is better, because if they keep fighting it might be one will kill the other. It might be if you keep meeting with him, you get in an accident and you die. Relax and submit to Allah swt.
The problem is we cannot submit because we say it is humiliating. If you say "I forgive him" or "I forgive her" you think you will humiliate yourself. If you don’t humiliate yourself you will never reach Divine Presence. You have to be humble. When you act humbly Allah will send rewards and send you better.
فَمَنْ عَفَا وَأَصْلَحَ فَأَجْرُهُ عَلَى اللَّهِ
"Faman `afa wa aslaaha fa ajruhu `ala Allah - Whoever forgives and makes peace gets reward from Allah"(42:40) - directly. You don't want to get revenge with your hand directly. Forgive, Allah gives more.
Struggling is very difficult for us. That anger within us makes us rebellious. It will never let you overcome yourself. What they do extra. They pray, you pray, they fast, you fast. They make dhikr, you make dhikr. What they make extra. Whatever you make extra they make the same as they are giving you what to do. But they went into seclusion to purify from the sediment of the self. They purify themselves of these bad characteristics. So that is why they enter the Maqaam al-Ihsan - the Station of Perfected Character. So as soon as you throw the bad characteristic in you then you enter first step in Maqaam al-Ihsan. They begin to take the veils (away).
The problem (is) we don't do what they told us to do. We don’t want to progress. They want to face lot of obstacles in purifying themselves. You fast, they fast. You eat, they eat, sometimes they are big even. They eat double. Some of them are big. They like to joke, no problem. You marry, they marry. You have children, they have children. You pray at night, they pray at night. So what do they do more? They entered the Maqaam al-Ihsan. They do voluntary worship, we don't do. That is the problem. We don’t do. What is voluntary worship? They feel with people. They share what they have with people. They give advice to help people, they overcome their ego. But for us our ego is overriding us. They ride their ego. They make their ego under them. "Nafsuka mati`atuka - Your self is your ride." Not you are the ride of the self. You make your self the horse. Now Shaytan and ego riding on us. That is the big difference and when they throw all these bad characteristics Allah opens for them state of love that is the holy hadith of Prophet (s). That is a very authentic hadith, like revelation a hadith qudsee.
"As much as My servant approaches me through voluntary worship until I love him; when I love him I will be his ears that he can hear with, I will be his eyes that he can see with, his ears that he can hear with, I will be his tongue can he can talk with, I will be with hand that he can touch with, and I will be his feet that he can walk with." ( Bukhari.)
Allah will give through love. Do we have love to Allah. No we have love to dunya. We run after dunya. Awliya run after Allah.
These are different in behavior. That is a difference in taste. The others are obligations. When you enter diplomatic status they teach you etiquette. They teach you how to laugh,how to walk, how to talk, how to smile. They never have bad manners. They never teach you in politics to hurt anyone feelings. But we hurt each other feelings. May Allah forgive us and may Allah protect us and for sake of the Prophet (s) and for sake of awliyaullah for sake of Ramadan.
"Afa `an man asa ilayk - Forgive the one who harmed you." (That means) Harmed you through reputation. Harmed you through what he did or in what he was supposed to do and didn’t do. Forgive.