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The Best of Manners

Mawlana Shaykh Hisham Kabbani

31 January 2014 Chicago, Illinois

Suhbah at Private Residence

A`oodhu billahi min ash-Shaytaani 'r-rajeem. Bismillahi 'r-Rahmaani 'r-Raheem. As-salaamu `alaykum wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuh.

Li kulli maqaamin makaar, for every respected place or for every place there is a different advice, makaar, a report. If we are sitting in an informal meeting and you say something and then in a formal meeting you say something else, every moment of our life has a meaning and a report to be done. Allah (swt) created angels to be with us to record every moment in our life and since everything is being recorded and registered, we say, “Yaa Rabbee, forgive us,” because without His Forgiveness no one can be saved!

Allah gave Prophet (s) makaarim al-akhlaaq, the best of manners, and he said to Sayyidina Abu Hurayrah (r), yaa Abaa Hurayrah `alayka bi husni ‘l-khuluq (or, bi husni ‘l-akhlaaq), “O Abu Hurayrah! Always you have to have good manners with you.” Abu Hurayrah (r) learned from Prophet (s) thousands of ahadith and with all that Prophet (s) said to him, “You have to have good manners.” And most of his ahadith are being taught today. On top of that, he (s) said to him, “You have to have good manners.” Didn’t all these ahadith didn’t tell him what are good manners and what are bad manners? So what do you expect he would have answered the Prophet (s)? You would expect him to say, “I know,” as under Abu Hurayra’s (r) name there are more than 4,000 ahadith.

So he asked Prophet (s), wa maa huwa husni ‘l-khuluq, “What are good manners?” Yes, he had learnt many, many ahadith and he was always in the presence of Prophet (s), and he is the biggest muhaddith as he was always there in the presence of Prophet (s) learning from him, memorizing these ahadith and still he asked, “What are good manners?”

Here it is a good tiding for us, Prophet (s) said, “From good manners, min husni ‘l-khuluq, an tasila man qata`ak, is to connect with the one who disconnects from you.” An tasila man qata`ak. Prophet (s) does not say anything except if it is a wahiyy, revelation.

إِنْ هُوَ إِلَّا وَحْيٌ يُوحَى وَمَا يَنطِقُ عَنِ الْهَوَى

Wa maa yantiqu `ani ’l-hawaa, in huwa illa wahyin yoohaa

He doesn't say anything from his desire, except revelation. (Surat an-Najm, 53:3-4)

If Prophet (s) opened his mouth to cough [Mawlana coughs] it is a wahiyy, for us it is wahiyy! He doesn’t say anything if it is not wahiyy. It means his movement is wahiyy, his actions are wahiyy, his speeches are wahiyy, his sleeping is wahiyy, his sitting with his children and family are wahiyy; everything he did is wahiyy. Wa maa yantiqu `ani ’l-hawaa, in huwa illa wahyin yoohaa. Wa ma yantiq, means nutuq, “If you say, ‘Ah!’ it is wahiyy,” nutuq is the sound that vocal cords make. So when his vocal cords used to say, “Ah,” it was wahiyy, “Alif’” it was wahiyy.

So whatever he (s) said was wahiyy, and he (s) said to Sayyidina Abu Hurayrah (r), “An tasila man qata`ak, connect with the one who disconnected you.” Since everything he (s) says is a wahiyy it means Allah is saying to him, “Say to Abu Hurayrah to connect with the one who disconnects,” this is from husni ‘l-khuluq. Who has the highest husni ‘l-khuluq? The Prophet (s). So it means Prophet (s) has more right to connect with everyone, because he is an tasila man qata`ak. We disconnect with him but he connects with us; it is the opposite here, since he said to Sayyidina Abu Hurayrah (r), “Husni ‘l-khuluq, the best of character is to connect with the one who disconnects with you.” And since his (s) words are wahiyy, it means that he (s) is saying, an `abd can say, “Yaa Rabbee, we disconnect with You, connect us!” So he said, if we connect then he connects, it is the opposite. If the khitaab is for us, what do you think about when we disconnect with Allah? It means Allah (swt), from husni ‘l-khuluq that He taught Prophet (s), will connect with His Servant. Is it not? What do you think if Allah “connects”? He will make a stone a jewel! He will make the dumb a wali! He will make the deaf hear angels! An tasila man qata`ak.

Yaa Rabbee silnee...that is why the qaseedah “Yaa Rabbee silni”:

O my Beloved One, connect me, yaa Rasoolullah, connect me

This disconnection now I cannot be patient

I have no patience anymore to be away from You

Connect me back (reconnect).

And you, yaa Sayyidee, yaa Rasoolullah! We are begging you to connect us back. An tasila man qata`ak. Wa an t`afuw man zhalamak, and to forgive the one who oppresses you. All of us, we are oppressing our religion and we are oppressing Prophet (s) by not doing what he wants. We make him look bad in front of Allah (swt) when his ummah is running away from him. Yaa Sayyidee, yaa Rasoolullah, yaa Rahmatan li ’l-`Alameen, from here we are calling you to connect us and to forgive us! If he connects us and forgives us, what do you expect? We are saved!

An tasila man qata`ak wa an ta`fuw man zhalamak. There is one more. Wa an t`utee man haramak, “And to give to the one who stopped you from getting it, the one who prohibits you.” For example, some people don’t give you water, they let you suffer from thirst, they block you. Does Allah block anyone? Does Prophet (s) block anyone? Wa an t`utee man haramak. We are haramna anfusana, we prevent it ourselves, we block ourselves from Prophet (s) and Allah (swt). Wa an t`utee man haramak, “to give the one who blocks you.” Your ego is blocking you. Try to eliminate the ego in order to reach what Allah and His Prophet (s) want to give you, they are waiting.

O Muslims, O brothers and sisters anywhere! Islam is not only a form, Islam is taste, to taste the sweetness of the words of Prophet (s)! He is sweet and his words are sweet! There are no higher words than his, because wa maa yantiqu `ani ’l-hawaa, in huwa illa wahyin yoohaa, his words are wahiyy.

So Allah gave two angels to write, the right one on the right side, Allah orders him immediately after you do something good to write it for you. Look at Allah’s Love to His servants. And the angels on the left, Allah orders him not to write and delay for 24 hours to write the sin as perhaps that person will repent. If that person repents in 24 hours saying, “astaghfirullah,” what will happen? He will take the sayyi`aat and write it as hasanaat, because you say, “astaghfirullah.” Now, we forget to say, “astaghfirullah.” When twenty-four pass we forget to say, “astaghfirullah.” Do you forget or not? You forget to say, “astaghfirullah.” You need a reminder, someone to remind you to say, “Say ‘astaghfirullah.’”

We said it many times. This is a [mobile] telephone, it is a haraam telephone. Everyone is carrying it and tick tick tick [typing] and then Google comes and on the right side pictures of naked men and women. What is this? Oh, an advertisement! So Shaytan followed you to your pocket; it is in your pocket reminding you every moment to see these shaytans on the right side. Is it not? Why are you quiet? Is this correct or not? [Haqq Sayyidee!] Or, on the bottom you see news or flash news and something comes on the bottom also a naked man or a woman. Is this a sin or not? So is this a haraam telephone or not? [Haraam.] Now you make it halaal, make it to remind you every hour to say, “Astaghfirullah.” So it becomes a good reminder! Read what is written here (on mobile phone), “Say, ‘Astaghfirullah,’ say ‘astaghfirullah.’” Every hour at the beginning it will ring and remind you to “Say, ‘Astaghfirullah,’ say ‘astaghfirullah.’” It turns from a haraam telephone to a halaal telephone, reminding you because we need a reminder. You cannot have an excuse and say, “Yaa Rabbee, I forgot.” You are using this [mobile phone] to remind you for work, is it not? Why not use it to remind you of Akhirah? So anyone you see with a phone, tell him to put a reminder every hour to, “Say ‘astaghfirullah.’” If you say “astaghfirullah,” what will happen? All sins are gone. When someone is saying, “Yaa Rabbee, astaghfirullah wa atoobu ilayk,” will Allah say, “No, I don’t accept?”

قُلْ يَا عِبَادِيَ الَّذِينَ أَسْرَفُوا عَلَى أَنفُسِهِمْ لَا تَقْنَطُوا مِن رَّحْمَةِ اللَّهِ إِنَّ اللَّهَ يَغْفِرُ الذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًا إِنَّهُ هُوَ الْغَفُورُ الرَّحِيمُ

Qul yaa `ibaadiya ’Lladheena asrafoo `alaa anfusihim laa taqnatoo min rahmatillaahi inna Allaaha yaghfiru ’dh-dhunooba jamee`an innahu huwa ’l-ghafooru ‘r-raheem.

Say, "O my Servants who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of Allah, for Allah forgives all sins for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (Surat az-Zumar, 39:53)

Don’t lose hope of Allah’s Mercy as Allah will forgive all sins, they will be deleted completely! It can delete here [mobile phone] when you press a button: delete, delete, delete and it is all gone. Angels can press a button, but he doesn’t record except every 24 hours or as Imam Senad said, “Delete all,” and it goes all the way, finished. That is a computer that deletes everything, you will not find anything recorded there anymore. Also, these angelic computers [on our shoulders], Allah (swt) erases everything when you say, “astaghfirullah.” Qul yaa `ibaadiya ’Lladheena asrafoo `alaa anfusihim laa taqnatoo min rahmatillaahi, to whom is He saying, Qul! “Say,”? To Sayyidina Muhammad (s). He is saying, “Say to them, yaa `ibaadiya ’Lladheena asrafoo `alaa anfusihim, O My Servant that has done a lot of sins! You didn’t leave any sin without doing it!’” What He said? Laa taqnatoo, “don’t lose hope as there is hope: I am giving you hope!” inna Allaaha yaghfiru ’dh-dhunooba jamee`an, Allah will forgive all sins. So what do you think about when Allah forgives you? When you have no sins and you became a pious servant going for dhikrullah, Allah (swt) says:

أَنَا جَلِيْسُ مَنْ ذَكَرَنِي

Anaa jaleesu man dhakaranee.

I sit with him who remembers Me. (Ahmad, Bayhaqi)

“I am with the one who remembers Me!” Allah will not sit with you, that is not the meaning; the meaning of ana jaleesun min dhakaranee is, “I will dress that person with My Beautiful Names and Attributes, in different dresses, to make him like a spotlight so that when someone looks at him, he runs to him.” Allah (swt) makes him someone with a reflection from Prophet (s), and that is awliyaullah that reflect from the Light of Prophet (s) to the ummah, because Prophet (s) wants to connect with you.

Open up, an tasila man qata`ak! If that is for a servant of Allah, so what do you think for Prophet (s)? He connects with everyone and everyone connects with him. You need a server to connect; emails, do they not go to a server to connect? What do you think about heavenly emails and a heavenly server? It connects with everyone! Everyone from Ummat an-Nabi (s) must pass through it, dunya and Akhirah, and by his shafa`ah Allah (swt) will forgive us.

May Allah (swt) forgive all of us, and bless all of us and make everyone happy with his family and children, and all those who are sick that Allah cures them completely and for those who are not sick to be always healthy .

Bi hurmati 'l-habeeb, bi hurmati 'l-Fatihah.


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