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The Best Character: a Lesson for Husbands and Fathers

Mawlana Shaykh Hisham Kabbani

19 November 2010 Burton, Michigan

Jumu`ah Khutbah at As-Siddiq Mosque

O Muslims, Believers! Today is last day of `Eid. Allah (swt) sacrificed a lamb instead of Sayyidina Isma`eel (a) because he is carrying the light of Sayyidina Muhammad (s), so that saved him. In that, Allah wants to show us there can be no two places in heart; only the heart can be for Allah (swt)!

O Muslims! Whatever you do has to be for Allah (swt)! Prophet (s) said, "I was a Prophet before Adam was between water and clay (between body and soul)." Because Allah (swt) wanted to show to Adam that he is the goal when Allah told all prophets to follow Muhammad (s). Then what about us?

Allah says:

إِنَّ اللَّهَ وَمَلَائِكَتَهُ يُصَلُّونَ عَلَى النَّبِيِّ

inn Allaha wa malaa`ikaatuhu yussalloona `ala 'n-Nabi.

Allah and His angels are praising on Prophet. (33:56)

Allah (swt) wants them to know about Prophet (s); He is giving direction to angels to praise, to make salawaat on Muhammad (s), because they didn't know. We do not follow what some say, that if you do too much you will make shirk. No! We are Muslims, and we are happy to say Allah (swt) called Prophet (s) "`abd, servant," because he is the best of Creation! That's what Allah (swt) said, when he wants to show the greatness of Prophet (s). He is saying, "I am giving you an oath," and that oath must be with the highest level of greatness.

In Surat al-`Asr, "asr" refers to the time when Prophet (s) was sent to humanity. Some scholars say it is from the beginning of the creation of Prophet (s), because he was created before Adam was between clay and water, before the beginning of time. That shows how much Allah loves His Prophet, and that's why He is taking oath on `asr (time), because that is the time He sent the best of His books, the Holy Qur'an, Allah's Word. Allah is giving an oath at that time when Qur'an came.

In tafseer Surat ad-Duha, in Ruh al-Bayaan, it is mentioned in a hadith,

ان استقامت امتى فلها يوم وان لم تستقم فلها نصف يوم

In istaqaamat ummatee falahaa yawm wa in lam tastaqim falahaa nisfa yawm,

If this nation has not been corrupted, Allah will give it one day of life, and if it is corrupt then Allah will give it the life of half-a-day.

وَإِنَّ يَوْمًا عِندَ رَبِّكَ كَأَلْفِ سَنَةٍ مِّمَّا تَعُدُّونَ

wa inna yawma inda rabbika ka-alfi sannatin mimma ta`udoon

Verily a Day in the sight of thy Lord is like a thousand years of your reckoning. (22:47)

Allah gave the ummah one day that is a thousand years long, as one heavenly day is a thousand years of dunya. So Allah gave the ummah a thousand years; and if it is not good, then the ummah begins to fall down. And now we are seeing the ummah is falling down since the time of Sayyidina Ahmad as-Sirhindi, Mujaddad alf ath-thani. Everything has not been correct; he brought it back Islamically. And then the hadith says, "but if the ummah is not going to be on istiqamah, on the straight path, they will have half-a-day," meaning 500 years. Now it is 1431 AH and most of the ahadeeth Prophet (s) predicted have come true, so we have only 59 years left for all the alamats to appear, and Allah knows best, but this is the tafseer. Allah (swt) is giving an oath by the light of that ummah, which is 1500 years, the ummah which is the best ummah, because in the time of Prophet (s) everything was perfect. Then, ummat an-Nabi was following Islam as Allah (swt) wanted.

O Muslims! Make sure you are following moderation, and make sure you are keeping your families happy! Prophet (s) said, "We are the ummah of moderation." This is the best of times, from the time of Prophet (s) until the Last Days, so you have to be in the middle, not following the extreme right or extreme left. You have to be modest.

Prophet (s) said, and as Allah (swt) revealed in Holy Qur'an, "Eat and drink, but don't waste." People today are wasting more than they are eating. In everything, they are wasting their lives. They are not eating or spending correctly. Don't be stingy with your family. Many complain today: don't be so stingy on your family, and also don't be too open-handed, but be in the middle. Be nice to your family, be in moderation, and not on extremes. Give charity. Don't hoard your wealth. Let your family and community be happy.

And I will end with this: Prophet (s) said, if you spend one dinar (coin) in the Way of Allah, it is as if you freed a slave, or for example, if you freed someone from prison! Or if you give one dinar to a poor person or spend on your family, which one is the best? The dinar you spend in the Way of Allah, to bring Allah's Name up to greatness, or the one who spends to free someone from prison or fire, or on a poor person, or to spend on our family? Abu Huraira (r) narrated that Prophet (s) said, "The best ajr is granted for what you spend on your family." That is to show how important it is to spend on your family.

After Sayyida Fatimah az-Zahra (a) passed away, Sayyidina `Ali (r) had four wives, whom he treated equally; the hadith states that daily he gave one of them (alternating) one dinar to buy meat. We are not saying to go marry four wives, we are saying practice equality. Eat and drink, and don't waste; be modest on how you spend. This is Allah's and Prophet's order. This is Islam, this is perfection, of how to build a family, how to be with children. When a husband or father comes home from work he should not get angry and shout at his family! Then, the kids and wife will run and hide from him in fear. Or if wife goes out to work, she should not come home and shout at the family. Don't bring home all the stress of your job; keep work in the office. Don't say, "I am working too much for all of you!" Don't show them you are doing something for them, like you are doing a favor for them. No! It is your duty, your job, and you are not doing a favor for them. You brought them into this life; you were so happy with your moment of pleasure, why didn't you think at that time? There are so many divorces now, so many difficulties today between husbands and wives, and children don't know where to go. The man marries a woman carrying behind her four or five children, the man carries four or five children behind him, because there is no modesty now.

O People! O Muslims! Be like Prophet (s) and keep his way, sunnah. He was always happy, he never made anyone angry with him, and he loved people. That's why Allah (swt) said about him, "You are the best in character."